I failed my piano exam. i kinda expected it but im really very sad about it cuz i know i really practiced and practiced and practiced and practiced until there s no end. and i got a super bad feeling that i will fail my poa and have to re take my module. Endless tears just keeps trickling down and trickling down like non stop. supposedly had a dinez date with my friends today but i just cancelled it, i think im gonna sulk for a year again. so many freaking things happen this year, if you think positively, they are very very good stepping stones for me to grow and mature, but if you think negatively, they are just pieces of shitz that pile up that make you depress like shit. im taught and mould to think positively but I just can help thinking the negative side, trying my best to hold back my tears and all, but I just cant stop feeling ashame of myself. I feel so damn freaking guilty towards my parents and my piano teacher, piano is sooo damn freaking expensive and like think my dad just throwed like 10k plus into the sea for only my grade 8 exam, and my teacher... yeah.. and so many people knew i took piano exam and then if i told them i failed, is like ...
anyway, the shit feeling im having now, is not the first time, psle, olevels, sam. yeah, it happened thrice. Now, the feeling is somewhat numb now and i just cant wait to leave this freaking earth.
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