FML

today is seriously not my day, should have stayed at home and not talk so much, cant be bothered to describe the whole ordeal again but i felt every so lonely, sombre, depressed,ached, angsty on my way home, tears just trickled down my eyes profusely, eyes was sore, nose was blocked, so furious till I was kinda like gasping for air, and i just walked barefooted cuz my braided sandals had no groove and it was raining. I cannot believe that history would repeat itself, I never felt so lonely and depressed since then.

WHY CANT I HAVE UNDERSTANDING PARENTS?!

I, JOLYN, FULL GETTIT THAT THEY LOVE ME ALOT BLABLABLA, THEY WORRY, HENCE, I NEED TO BE HOME EARLY, I CANNOT GO OUT OFTEN, I NEED MY REST. but seriously, i am not tired, with the right company, im having fun, im enjoying, i don't feel tired.  im like some party pooper, the first to leave, the last to reach, like who will wanna miss out all the fun, who will want to dampen people's spirit, i mean like, im not damn pops or damn outcast but obviously, if one leaves earlier, is like not brooder enough kind, is like might as well u dun come and spoil the whole freaking event...
and hello? im like 17? i tot my parents love to compare me with other kids? they love to compare how other parents treat them like recently my mum just told me that there's a kid whose blanket will get throwed by her mum if she does not folds them.. ya. so freaking compare me with them now. other kids out there has relax curfew since after o's? they don't have to feebly ask their parents for permission to go for this that this. fancy a 17 yr old, who has to reach home before 9 plus ? and sometimes even is restricted and limited to a a max of 2 hours. and not being able to go out at most days.

THEN THEY WILL ARGUE THIS: why I did not accompany them to visit their mothers and so on, why im only interested in my stuffs. HELLO, OBVIOUSLY. LOOK.  teachers, everybody also told us to pick the course we like, the course we are interested etc. obv, who will favour things they hate. I mean like my grandma's birthday(dad's side) and my bestie's birthday was on the same day, obv, without any hesitation, i would go to my bestie's birthday even if is my grandma's wedding day or some big big birthday kind of thing. oh wateva. Like so wad if is family ties, my blood runs in them and dont runs in my friends, so what? I dont feel attach to them, i mean i will cry even more if my bestie dies then my grandma(father's side) dies. Like its just awkwardness, weird atmosphere, strangery, acquaintanie feel. THEN THEY WILL ARGUE THIS: when u need help, ur family will help u, like funerals, wedding, nobody is gonna attend, u think ur friends will give u 100000 if u need it urgently? etc" SO WHAT, THIS IS REALITY WAD, I MEAN LIKE MONEY IS SENSITIVE AND SINCE MY BESTIES ARE NOT FAMILY BLOOD LINE THINGY, THEY WONT HELP SO WHAT, SO WHAT IF NOBODY ATTENDS MY FUNERAL OR WEDDING.  I don't really care, i mean, cuz i dont even feel attach to them? i will feel sad la, but not like depressed or wateva, i just wanna enjoy my life and try to make choices which I like, which i favour, which I enjoy and not get leashed like some dog being fed with a few choices that is preferred by my parents. Im not saying they always restrict me but most of the times, there are times where surprisingly they will give in. But these few times where they make such a fuss out of it which is fucking annoying and obviously, i will rebel and turn hateful and start to forget those few mini times where they were suibian. But wateva, i know this is life, but I just kinda feel so sorry for myself at times, not being able to enjoy much more when others cant, maybe im greedy, but what i know is that i really wanna get out of this freaking place asap and make more choices that i like, okay. i will be sad to leave my parents, no more getting pocket money, more things to worry, burdened, but at least im exposed, at least I can make more choices, I can choose.

yup, so actually, went i left them, i cried secretly, cuz huiling whispered to me isit cuz ur dad, nvm, anything tell me la then she hugged me, gosh it was damn touching, likewise in my previous post, just a mere aquaintany friend kind will even say something ever so sincere which really crept up to my heart and melted it. Huiling and I aren't that close and were just like accquainatish friendish. The molly, kelly, julie all out of a sudden came and followed me, was super taken aback cuz i tot when i cried I was back facing them and all, but oh well, i think i shouldnt be too ego, sometimes being ego is not that good, making u more depressed, and molly and julie gave me a group hug<3 really touched <3 no matter how sucky nx time i think they are or wateva, i will really treasure them and help them. "Friend in need is a friend needed" when i was young, I didnt understand this statement, but now i truly understand it, I used to childishly think that people who needs help are always my friends but is not the case, i believe is something like whenever a friend needs help or comfort, and one being sincere, lending a hand, is indeed a true best friend, is the sincere, comforting feel offered by ur friend. <3 really thank god for all of them. My poly life is sucky, but I met true friends which is the best stamina pills to keep me going on with life. suddnly, i feel drifted apart from my sec friends, and np kiddos, kinda feels empty but yup, i have them, and this is just part and parcel of life.





Hopefully one day, they can let me go bit by bit.

SPOOKTACULAR!

Spookylar was 7.5/10 :)
1) initially, there was a wave of awkwardness and mehness but after dinner, we played heart attack abd chucky chucky:)
2) i had ulcer:( idk why it suddbly hurts so badly when i shout n tok, i alwayd had ulcer but idc and cn withstand the pain but dk why:( nw like so gu niang:( like abit irritated and annoyed by thepain. But somehow, had fetish for pain( not the accidental kind, molly shld gt it!)
3)las part was kinda sianish alr cux i was abit tired, feel like a weakling, nid to find my endurance spirit back soon:(( hopefully im nt some party pooper, hate being party pooper man:( geel so restricted many times, so many regualtions being enforced on meeee! Poor jolyn:( i really envy my friends and all. I knw like my parents worry and all but they shld learn to let me go slowly since im bloody 17 already?! I could have lie to them im in chalet or camp, lest they gt paranoid and start texting and calling like siao.but oh well.... Lige sucks. I always not those kind of ah lianish paikia so yeah...
4) but had some fun company, like huiqin, we held hands and walky walky, made few small talks wif her n roxanne too! Had fun wif molly too, we jus hooked hands and nua all the way when we ended the trail. Oh and i was damn touch when lionel suddnly adkrd me abt the latest time i reached home etc. and then he decided to flag for a cab at the road and let molly and i nua at the taxi stand. Super duper shocked and touched. I mean like we are just friends, nt even acquaintance anf hre had such thought, also, me and him are like in between acquaintance and friends lvl so is like holy mama! I mean i will nt do this to like acq n friends lvl. Either he is really a gentleman or bcuz he also has curfew. But lol, to my surprise he actually didnt la cuz he was telling us he gonna have kway chup at bishan after fetching us back. I felt quite guilty that i doubted him so yeap, gonna really owe him one favour.
5) it was quite scary. Esp my first trail. The ghost were really scary looking and i was petrified with the monk who sat on the floor in between the roads and the other ghosts who sat on floor or stand in between narrow routes :(

IJ WAS GOODY WOODY!l
Before anf after ij i made like a aqquaintanish friendish friend-nic, ohwell, kinda same channel i think but oh, i think recently molly is quite guilty of pangsehing me cuz of my prev post whereby i discussed about the awkwardness wif her classmates( LOL DUN LAUGH MOLLY ) but like yeah... Obv... Will awkward la, but is part and parcel, i mean as long as their class dates are like dates when im bz or have a friend to pei me then im fine maaa! Like dun make me look stewpid walking alone in poly, like she can jus sent me to bussiestop and cont wif her ex class dates (YEAH MOLLY. TAKE NOTE ) hahaahha. Sillly pilly lily mollly.
i tot jesslyn was gonna pangseh meee cuz she alr has a good of friends. But she was damn sincere to invite me to sit wif her. So yeah, wasnt really awkward too cuz only like 4/10 chances i would nt b in the same channel. But later, our cher seperated us into grps and i grped wif this 2 guys and this gal. 1guy and the gal are yhe nerd kind. But both guys are like same channel as me and the gal quite reserved so yup, i had the limelight! I gave alot of smart ideas okay! And many of my ideas was complimented:) i think i work perfect in this kind of environment, limelight and majority are same channel:) but all of us were willing to help and all, the gal slowly opened up too:) it was quite fun:) and our roller coaster was the best okay! It can travel up to 5.00 seconds and had a damn cool end, it has 2 tracks being branched out at the end- either free fall or the "safe" track whereby it will travel and end up in the tunnel( the tunnel is made from the plasticine so damn creative! )

Inspirational

HAPPY BURSTAY KAIXIN!

Went to my dearie sarah s house today to grab kx prezzies! ( loots from bugis st ) SARAH S ROOM SO PWEETY! obv... Since she lives in a terrace! BUT I ONLY TOOK A LITTLE GLANCE SINCE HER UHMONEH WAS WITH ME! HAAHHAAHAH! I just STOLE HER PET PHRASE!

Then hopped to novena! Had soghurt wif sarah and we decided to plan a little mission for kaixin- we placed her loots at another table, and will like fake up a story, and being curious kaixin, she will take it, and we will be like finder s keepers! :) hooray!

But then when kx came, she wnted to have soghurt again:( ithink inspent like 8 bucks on soghurt today:( ohmann. Bt it was nice! I didnt gt tired over itttt!!:)

<3

FIRST DAY OF SCH

First day of sch was still fine.. Ketchup with suhui when molly was away! But it was super duper awkward when molly reunited with her class at the end of her class, is like "lets have a class lunch", "class gathering". Like i felt that i was damn transparent ttm man, it was awkward max and i was signalling molly to gooo but ohwell she was too engrossed i i think. Although all of us are like acquainted but still feels awkward yo, cuz im nt even from their class, forcing urself into this grp is damn meh, i myself also hate ppl forcing into my grps so obv is a nono for me to force myself into their existence! Thank gawd for some eq:) oh well, if only thigs started differently in the beggining of poly... Suayyyy..But her class is really damn fun and bonded, oh memoriessss! Saw smoker and ketchup too! Then saw a few other aquaitances!

Decided to getway to some thrift stores but cuz my 3g was damn laggy, my batt was running low, and since i was texting weiwei, i decided to jio her to bugis! And got some lovely loots:$ a lacey lined crop, lovely earings( REELY LIKE THE VINTAGE LEAF, BUT SOMEHOW IS TOO OVERDRESS, AND THE LONDON SOLDIERS ONE IS DAMN KEWL TOO! I WANTED TO GT OWLS BUT IS TOO COMMON! HATE COMMON STUFFZ! AND THE NEON GREEN SHADE IS SUPER UNIQUE!!!! WAS ACTUALLY CONTEMPLATING THIS WIF ANOTHER PETALLED PASTEL EARING! )

Oh i bought tw sausage and some pancakes at bugis street too! That uncle was damb lao tiko. He kept flirting-.- oh god, stewpid, i mean like if is some damn good lookin ahbeng 8 wouldnt mind, but an uncle-.- ohwell, is buiz anyway, and it enhances one s life!

Was chatting wif weiwei on our rides to and fro, shared wif her many yolo stories! Come to think of it, my life is really a bore, thank god for frozen i had some yolo wishes fufilled, achievment unlocked! YAY! But then, is still not sufficient to satisfy my greed la! Lemme think of some interesting task:
1) prawning till damn late with kewties
2) explore a club
3) drink drink and more drinks
4) chalet wif kewties and naiceys
5) some reely cool parties( oh, comin up, rena s gonna have her 21st at my house, it is
Jus a coincidence, but i dont think it is gonna be a yolo one )
6) gt a job and find some kewties and naiceys.

Ohgod, i sound so disgusting and despo. Super brain dead. Screw it!
But somehow i feel that my ootd to sch today was damn cui, apparently ny hw shorts is super loose and i damn lazy to alter it. And tht top pairs better wif hw jeans:( ohwell, screw ittt. Oh! And my taobao stuffs came, the top looks lovely but i cut till the hw den was so super short. Had to sell it..... Making a lost of 10 bucks or so i think;( haishhh! NEED MONEY! >:(

THE LAS DAY OF MY HOLIDAY:(

Its the last day of my holiday today:( gonna start poly tmrw:) really suck, i think i still have like a few dreams i haven accomplished like some going with x and y and z etc.. :(

Went to play badminton today again! Glad that I toned some muscles and sweat it out! But oh gosh, I really smelt leh, even though during np/cibtc, we had alot of physical training and like running, but i didnt smelt as badly even though I was like a drenched chicken. But my goodness, I think I really stank, like not BO(DUH!) is like those sweaty smelly, I told my dad and asked him why I suddnly smelt so bad, he said wad my body has alot of toxi, food rotted, blabla, makes sense though! I haven shitted for like 1.5 days and I drank :) So should be ba! teeheehee But i felt damn cui and nua, luckily my dad sent me home, I was able to wash up and nua on the sofa. I was so damn lazy to comb my hair. TADA! UNKEMPT JOLYN WITH SOME SWAROSKI CRYSTALZ:

                                                              

and then I decided to do some braiding:) is like a the fringe there... mehh iphone cam suddenly suck

   

 

But before going for badminton, dropped by bugis awhile and was loitering at the kids section and chanced upon so many pretty and kewt bibs! Don't they look adorable and delicious, hahaha prolly, there will be like a "bibs" trend for  woman next time since peterpan collars etc. are so in trend now. haha, I hope I will have a daughter next time! Then I can decorate her like  a little princess:) and she is gonna have those kewt little voice and those silky moistured hair and oh! lovely kewt bangs:) YAY!